Succeed When You Think Of Success
By Ivery Keena Castilloux
Growing up as a child, I always heard the following phrases "You are what you eat", or maybe "You are what you wear", but have you ever thought of "You are what you think" - the latter is a line of thinking that most forget to include. Look into the mirror; look at the shape of your face, every pimple, dimple, scar - at how your pupils dilate like ink hitting a sheet of glass. What you see in the mirror is all that the mirror tells you. You see every detail and may fear that image as if it was Medusa, but the mirror can only judge a book by its cover. We may fear the image of our self, but the mirror can't see the complex thinking - only the outer image. The question is how we make that mirror say "You are the most successful of them all".
If I prick my finger, sensory neurons send a message to my central nervous system and then on to my brain. If I wish to move that finger my brain sends motor neurons to that region of my body. People believe that the brain controls the body, but what if I were to tell you that your body can re-wire how your brain works? Usually your body language reflects when you feel nervous, scared, or any emotion for that matter. So your brain (your thinking process) will make you feel these emotions, and project it in your body language. See when we think we are not confident, we feel we are not confident, and therefore our body language shows we are not confident (Thinking - emotion -body language) this is the normal process, but what about the other way around. What if I make my body language show confidence, which makes me feel confident, and then I begin to think I'm confident (Body language - emotion - thinking).
The following are some examples of body language
1) Shoulders: Pushed back shoulders convey confidence and it also builds good posture.
2) Hands on hips: A strong confident pose for men is the act of having their hands on their hip and pointed towards their genitals. For women it is hands on the hips pointed towards the buttocks.
3) Chin up: Chin up shows to the world you are proud.
I mention this because you have 90 seconds to convey who you are to person before they make up their mind. Most people believe that we communicate with words, but unfortunately 90% of communication is through body language. We don't need to tell someone we are angry as we cannot see it, nor do we have to tell someone we are happy - we can see it. How often does a guy or girl tell you they find you attractive on the first meeting? They should not have to as our bodies naturally convey attraction, and even make us look more attractive. To sum it up the use for being fully versed in one's body language (Note it is different for social classes, and culture) is not as useful as it was thousands of years ago. But it does give us an edge, and we still communicate with it.
So what do I do? I have two options, first I can take the thinking - emotion - body language route. In this line of thought I can begin to tell myself "I'm Confidant" and continue to think this through until I feel like it - and show it. The second way would be to right away show it by pushing my shoulders back. The confidence shows, now I feel it, and then I think it. I have swagger while I walk down the street to my interview.
Our body has muscle memory for what it shows and how we feel. For example, someone with wrinkled lines on their forehead are stressed often, someone that has lines between their eyebrows often get angry, and someone who has laugh lines... well you get the point. So if I push my shoulders back, eventually my body will do it naturally. The same can go for thinking. If I wake up every morning, stare into that mirror, and then say over and over "I'm the most successful of them all", or something lengthier - I will trick myself into that line of thinking.
We have talked about how to change our body language, or how to think certain thoughts, but we have not talked about influencing our thinking with what we eat, who we are friends with, or what we do. There are environmental factors and actions that lead to certain lines of thinking.
Maybe I feel like I'm fat and so I go to the gym (Action) and after I feel less overweight (Thinking). I keep up the action of going to the gym for a week and have not really lost weight, but I do feel like I have. I also feel unhealthy and so I eat some healthy food - I feel healthier after. This week I will be attending high society events, plays, drinking expensive drinks, and wearing nice clothing - I feel like a millionaire and think like one because of it. I tell myself I'm going to have a good day and some bad things happen, but I tell myself today is going to be a good day - and it ends up being it.
We put ourselves in situations where we don't fit in, or feel we deserve. I served in the army when I was 16 and lived with guys that were much older than I. Every night they would go to the bars/clubs, drinking, picking up women - while I sat at home playing World of Warcraft. One night I decide to try to sneak into a night club. I remember riding the bus, nervous, sweat dripping down, and feet convulsing with the vibrations of the vehicle moving. You can do things in your life that make you feel/think a certain way, which leads you do more things - it's a cycle of success if you hop on.
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